Wednesday, June 11, 2008

Top Chef Finale

Tonight at 9. A few thoughts though before my prediction.

How is it that some moron can get paid an insane amount of money to come up with the idea that Bravo should host a Pop Culture Awards Show? Furthermore, what ad genius came up with the stupid American Idol style stunt in which Kathie Lee Griffin (a person I find very funny) "wins" the right to host that monkey crap? Isn't that the equivalent of winning the right to get infected with AIDS to see if a new medicine will work? Good thing she is already on the D-List.

How crappy is it to be the person who gets kicked off Top Chef first? You have to go to that reunion show and try and convince everyone that you "would have really wowed some people and gone far"; yet everyone knows that is a lie becuase you could barely make pizza taste good. And then awkwardly say, "My 24 hours spent in _____ will really help my career down the line."

Remember my earlier post on Top Chef? In which I pointed out the sneakiness of the top Chef Producers? Well, that was obviously foreshadowing that would have made Steinback say "Whoa!" (in a Joey Lawrence voice). I think Lisa takes it tonight. Here is why.

Lisa has some talent. She can not cook rice, she makes my basset hounds look active, and she is not a team player, but she can can put together unusual and delicious flavors, according to the judges. As of today I have yet to taste her food. She pulled off peanut butter mashed potatoes and that miso bacon. Although incredibly lazy and a huge brat attack, all she has to do is put together one amazing meal (and will have help from the last 3 Top Chef winners, this is my guess). If she gets paired with Hung, likely, she will walk away with the title of Top Chef (said in a Padma voice). She will be able to lean on Hung's classic technique, vast culinary knowledge, speed, and drive. Thus not only increasing her strengths but using Hung's strengths to hide her weaknesses.

The competition has trimmed away two of the best chefs all along, Dale and Antonia, leaving Richard and Stephanie to battle it out with Lisa. Many people think Stephanie or Richard is the obvious choice based on their near dominance so far. But remember Top Chef only takes into account the food prepared in the present. No points are awarded for last week.

Lisa is the obvious choice to win because its the same story line Bravo tried to do in season 1 and 2, with Tiffani and Marcel respectively and finally succeeded in Season 3 with Hung. The story line goes like this, granted it is all done in post-production (I do not think there is a conspiracy while they film the show, just in the editing room): hide a chef for the first few episodes, make this chef out to be a bad boy/girl that does not play well with others, they stick around by the skin left on their dull knives, and then suddenly they are winning events and in the finale. They put together an amazing meal and get to say, "Nobody believed in me, but me."

So the prediction for tonight. Either Richard or Stephanie shits the bed, the judges proclaim that all around Lisa presented the most thoughtful, well executed meal, and that Richard/Stephanie would have won but for course ______ which really "missed the mark." Of course the Patriots were the obvious choice to win the Super Bowl.

Take that to the bank and smoke it.

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