Monday, November 15, 2010

What You Can Get Us For Christmas: Part 1

Fact: The best thing about writing on this website is no one can ever say, "Love your writing, use it to wipe my ass/potty train my terriers/send enemies dead fish."

Fact: If you read our work, there is a ninety percent chance you like food and booze based on the search terms that bring you to our corner of the Information SuperHighway. There is a ten percent chance you are a huge fan of Lavar Burton.

Fact: You owe us some gifts. 

Now granted, the gift giving holidays are a ways off. But each week till Baby Jesus arrives and sees his shadow meaning we have six more weeks of football, we will give you tips for gifts to get your favorite bloggers. Who knows maybe you can even give it to someone you actually like.

You know what would be awesome this year for Christmas? Instead of giving me a Barry Manilow Croons the Classics CD and a pair of Argyle socks, if you dropped off a dry aged hunk of beef with my name on it. Here is how you do it. Go to Rare Cuts and purchase a "primal." A primal is just a non-portioned cut of steak (i.e. an entire tenderloin). Then Rare Cuts ages it for however long I want (tenderloin 30 days, rib eye 35+, Strip 40+). After that time elapses, they cut it up into individual steaks or roasts. They call you on the phone and you deliver it to my house. Leave it outside though or the hounds will eat it.

Now, the benefit to this is that normally you pay more per pound for dry aged beef. This is because the butcher loses part of the meat to the noble rot, so therefore it charges more on the meat he can use. But if you go through Rare Cuts they charge you the rate pre Dry Aging. While the prices aren't cheap, they will make us realize how much you appreciate us, which is the entire reason behind the season. Even better, get together a group of your blog reading friends and go in on a primal together. Then you split the cost up and each of you can give us  3-4 steaks.


Matt said...

I am a fan of LeVar Burton... Get it right next time!

NOJuju said...

Fact: You owe us some gifts.

I do?? I think you owe ME some gifts. I will accept meat from Rare Cuts or a bottle of Hendricks. Get on that.

KS said...


only 10% chance of being a LeVar fan, well stamp me a 10%er. I could take or leave the Star Trekies, but the man was Kunta Kente, and don't even get me started on reading rainbow, man now you got the theme in my head. Take a look, its in a book, .....